Agnes: It’s Not About Agnes

You’d think if you were going to name a movie after a character, it’d be one of the main ones.

Agnes is maybe in 10 minutes of the movie, mostly in a really bad wig.

The movie starts off like so many possession movies: an old, disgruntled priest who must team up with an almost-priest (he just has to take his vows); an uptight mother superior; and a former priest/bad boy who performs exorcisms. A nun is possessed, the two priests aren’t able to banish the demon so they call in the bad boy who IMMEDIATELY banishes the demon.

Now the movie turns over to Mary, Agnes’ friend in the nunnery (is that what you call it??), who quits the order because of the advice her possessed friend gave her, and stays on her until the end. Quite a turn from the first half of the movie, Mary gets a job, has trouble paying rent, possibly gets hit on by her boss to become a sex worker, and fucks Agnes’ teacher (yes, teacher!) boyfriend. Once she fucks the guy from the Gilmore Girls, she becomes kinda possessed. But then, the movie ends with a long conversation Mary has with the young priest (who by now has taken his vows) where he equates god to being the meat in a sandwich (“god con carne!”).

THE END.

Woah, woah. I thought this was a possession movie? And then it turns into a character study.

So much of the dialogue is focused on sex and the priest/nunhood – what they’re missing out on by giving up their life for the church. What’s left is a confusing mashup of church cynicism and god-is-love talk.

I don’t get it.

P.S. Did you notice Rachel True is a nun? (Rochelle from The Craft)