Things Heard & Seen

Modern horror movies have become so easy to predict. And by that, I mean, I usually predict the ending sucks. And this one sucked. The worst part about it is that you think that those 90 minutes might be leading up to some awesome ending, but instead…it got fucked up.

You’ve seen this setup before. Couple moves away from the big city to the quiet. The husband is a cheating asshole. The woman has an eating disorder, which never really ties back into the story. The house is probably haunted. The husband is probably a murderer. Well, he is, you find out pretty quickly.

And the ghost? Trying to warn the wife her husband will kill her. He does, and then she becomes a ghost with the other ghost. And the husband, about to get caught by a woman he didn’t manage to kill, sails into the sea to get devoured by some magical sea whirlpool.

So, the dude is an asshole and a murderer. We know. The ghost knows. And so does the wife, who gets murdered anyway. He gets sucked into a sea hole and doesn’t get caught.

It’s unsatisfying. Why introduce a plotline (the bulimia) when it goes nowhere? Why take the whole movie to warn the wife and then she gets AXE MURDERED, and he’s just hanging out at his parents’ house!?!?

At least in other horror movies, it’s the wife standing hacking the shit out of her murderous spouse. But nope. She dies. He wins. And then dies from some other, not very related decision.

Recommended for…

Uh…good question.